Divorce is not easy, and sometimes emotions exaggerate the challenges. If you are considering a divorce, try to keep as calm as you can, and use common sense to take these actions that may help your good divorce lawyer achieve a better outcome for your case:
1. It Starts at Home
Divorce can be very distracting, even from your most important job which is being an attentive parent. Your children need a safe and stable home environment, and to feel you are attending to their needs. Make sure to maintain the children’s usual activities and be the same parent who always took an interest in these activities. Stay in touch with their teachers, and if it seems needed, obtain counseling for the children. Stay in the home with the children; in certain cases, if you were to move-out and leave them with your spouse, a judge could interpret that unfavorably for you in the child custody arrangement.
2. Daily Record
Your child custody lawyer needs you to keep a diary of all your activities with your children. Record the time you spend with them, and also record the time they spend with the other parent. You should record anything that will affect the children, such as arguments or ridiculing comments made in front of the children. Record when the spouse is expected to pick-up the children, and when the spouse actually does pick-up the children – and the same on their return to you.
It’s important to document the activities and events you record. This could include school records or witnesses who can verify when a child is picked-up from school or activities, or someone who could testify about parenting behavior. Of course, police reports are needed if anything escalates to that level.
Make sure you strictly abide by any pick-up/drop-off agreements and behave as an exemplary parent, as your spouse may be keeping a diary as well.
You will need to make copies of documents pertaining to finances, including pay stubs, records of any loans, credit card statements, bank records, and retirement savings records. Your child support lawyer will need these to help protect you financially. Your attorney will want to see all the documentation you have collected and will guide you on any further documentation needed for your case. To facilitate confidential communication with your attorney, it may be helpful to get a cell phone of your own (not on your family’s plan) and establish an email account that your spouse cannot access.
4. Reduce Use of Social Media
Social media is an area where it’s easy to make a mistake that can negatively affect your divorce or custody case. It is best to curtail your use of social media during this time. Do not ever use social media to mention your divorce or custody case, or to criticize your spouse in any way. Think about how your social media posts reflect you as a parent. In general, the less said on social media the better while you are going through divorce or child custody litigation,
5. Contact Perna & Abracht
If you are thinking of divorce and have children, you need divorce attorneys who have handled these cases before, such as our team at Perna & Abracht. If you have just started considering divorce, we can guide you through steps to take when considering divorce and through this difficult time.